Breakups Blow.
So, I’ve been obsessed with watching Sex and the City lately. All the dating, sex, and drama have made me feel a little less like I’m alone in the world and a little more like all single women deal with the same dating bullshit. Yes, I know it’s a television show, trust me, they have way more sex than me. Plus they literally meet men everywhere. Literally anywhere they go, they meet a new love interest. Maybe that only happens in Manhattan? Or maybe I don’t get out often enough? Or maybe I’m doing something wrong when I’m in the grocery store that prohibits men from talking to me. All could be equally true.
A recent episode inspired me (and this post) based on Burger dumping Carrie via Post It note with a very simple phrase.
I’m sorry I can’t. Don’t hate me.
Girlfriends (or boyfriends, I don’t discriminate) what is the worst way to break up with someone?
Let me tell you my top 3.
- He didn’t. I found out he had been cheating on me via a Facebook photo from his side bitch who tagged him in a post with I love you balloons and flowers. Yes, I said balloons. First, I’m not sure what’s worse, the fact he thinks balloons are an appropriate way to say I love you or the fact that he had sex with me the day after he sent this bitch balloons. I didn’t find out until the next week because he had the “decency” to defriend me on Facebook first. Jackass.
- He left for ice cream with his ex and never came back. We lived with his dad…together… I waited for 2 days without any word from him. I called the jails and the hospitals, then I decided he likely went back to his ex-wife. So, I packed my shit and left. I didn’t see him again for 2 years. At which point he came up to me at a hardware store and said, “Hey, don’t I know you?”. I responded, “Hey, how was ice cream? It’s only been 2 fucking years since you left.”
- He never responded again. Fool didn’t even say J, I’m sorry I can’t, don’t hate me. He legit just never talked to me again. What a fucking asshole.
Guys, guess what? These are shitty ways to break up with someone. What are you afraid of? Maybe she will cry? Freak out? Be angry? Guess what else? She will. You just didn’t have the sack to deal with it like a decent adult male. So, spare me the bullshit and give her some fucking closure. It’s rude, offensive and incredibly insulting to take one of the three approaches listed above or some other crude way that I haven’t listed. Not cool douche face.
Face it. Breakups blow. Always.
Breakups blow, they just do. Trust me on this, I’ve had my fair share. Nothing is ever “amicable”. No one just goes separate ways. Regardless of how they are done, someone’s feelings are always hurt. Man (or woman) up and have an adult conversation. Or any conversation. Just at least let the person know your relationship is effectively over. Even if it is a fucking Post-it.
