As you know, I was cheated on. His cheating resulted in her becoming pregnant and them running off together into the sunset of happiness, while I was left with the second worst heartache I’ve ever had. My anger over the situation has been directed mostly at him. But he’s not the only one to blame. So here it is, an open letter to the girl who slept with my boyfriend.
Dear side bitch,
Please learn to count.
While some may believe that he is the only one responsible, I am angry with you too. You assisted him in breaking my heart. You allowed him to lie to me and take the cowards way out. The damage you both did to me has caused irreparable harm and chaos in my life that was unnecessary. You are responsible for causing me pain that could have been avoided with honesty. Women should build one another up, not compete and destroy each other. [clickToTweet tweet=” A relationship is made for two people. So both of you need to learn to count. Three is a fucking crowd. ” quote=” A relationship is made for two people. So both of you need to learn to count. Three is a fucking crowd. “]
Maybe you knew, maybe you didn’t.
Either way you were the other woman. Deep down I knew what was happening behind my back. Or rather in front of my fucking face. My friends told me his behavior meant he was cheating and I chose to keep living in denial. But I wasn’t naive enough to not know what he was actually doing all those nights but I am sorry I overlooked it as long as I did. I do know that I blew him up enough during that time to be suspicious enough that either you played dumb or you did know someone was texting and calling him. Someone expected him home. You allowed him to ignore me and wreak havoc on my heart and mind. Then you fucked him.
Know your worth.
So we know you can’t count and now we also know you have low self-esteem. When I found out about you, I ended it immediately. No man is going to cheat on me. When I found out and told you about it, you continued to see him. You knowingly continue to date someone who had sex with me the day after he told you he loved you via helium. Last time I checked, when someone says they love you, they don’t go to another woman’s house tell her the same thing and engage in intercourse. That’s disgusting. But then that’s exactly what happened so rather, someone who actually means it wouldn’t do that. You’ve told me a lot about yourself and how much you think you are worth. He was cheating on you too! He did repeatedly. You may not be worth much, but I am worth way more than being the third wheel in my own relationship.
Do you believe you are now the exception?
Girl, you are never the exception. You are always the rule. If he cheated with you, he will cheat on you. I would be shocked if he wasn’t already cheating on you. But that’s your problem now not mine. He has a really long history of cheating. Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern. I’ve heard from 7-10 women he’s cheated on and he has repeated this same behavior his entire life. That’s a personality trait and people don’t change.
If I’m being honest.
I could tell you that he tried to get back together with me for over a month after I broke up with him upon finding out he was cheating on me with you. That would be true. I could tell you that he apologized to me for a month while he lied about your pregnancy to me and the day I found out he had asked me to hang out. That would also be true. I could tell you that he called you names and talked shit about you for months while we were together. Also true, but I’m sure you already know how he actually is. He is a terrible person.
Psycho or psychic?
He used you to make me jealous and you allowed him to. When you started calling again we had a conversation about you, and that the repeated contact made me uncomfortable He claimed to block you, then when you called again he played dumb. He legit said, maybe Apple only blocks people for a month. I told him, I’m not an idiot and I know how fucking blocking works. So rather than go on our date like we planned, I would bet that when he left in anger and I didn’t hear from him all night, he actually just went to you because I was causing problems and you were too dumb to see his shitty behavior and do anything about it. I’ve sure you have used my messages and “crazy” behavior to gain sympathy and justify cheating with you. That’s what people with his psychopathy do. Google triangulation. I’m sure you likely believe him, just like I did when he told me the same and I believed him, even when women messaged me to tell me they had slept with him while we were together.
Honestly, I pity you.
I pity the fact that you would lower yourself enough to stay with a man who you know had sex with someone else the day after sending you flowers and I love you balloons. What woman has a low enough respect for herself to do that? Someone who says they love you wouldn’t actually do that to someone they love. You could have encouraged him to end things with me before pursuing a relationship, especially a sexual one with someone else’s boyfriend. I pity the fact that you are obviously not smart enough to see through his facade, his lies, and his shady behavior. That’s typically why narcissists and sociopaths move on from women like me. Too strong and too smart. So they move on to weaker women with lower self-esteem. I pity the fact that you got knocked up by such a lowlife and that you are now stuck with him forever. When did you get pregnant? Does it make you feel bad that your child was conceived while he was committed to someone else? Or are you just happy “you won”? Congratulations, your prize is a lying, cheating d bag. You now have a boyfriend and baby daddy who is a lying, cheating, convicted felon and drunk driver without a license. Awesome catch there girlfriend.
Learn some respect.
I am angry that you disrespected yourself and me enough to sleep with my boyfriend without protection, therefore jeopardizing my health. I feel sorry for you that you are now stuck with his child when he can’t pay for the one (or two) he already has and doesn’t take care of. It concerns me you think he will make a good father when he has proved otherwise bringing a 10-year-old son around multiple women and teaching a child that cheating is okay. I pity the fact that your child will also learn the behaviors of a narcissistic sociopath father and that all of you will eventually suffer at the hands of him because he is not capable of truly loving anyone but himself. I pity you for believing his lies again when not so long ago you broke his glasses and punched him in the face but now are delusional enough to think he changed. Last, I pity that you were stupid enough to get into a car with him and allow him to drive you and your unborn child over two hours to only get him arrested for a DUI, rather than protecting yourself and your future child. I hope you learn to respect yourself.
Karma’s a bitch.
I may pity you but ultimately I hope you get what you deserve. You don’t deserve my pity or my attention. Karma is a bitch and while I may have got mine, I’m sure you will both get yours. Karma served him a DUI that night when he was supposed to be with me. When he was supposed to come “home” to me and instead picked you up drunk. He is worthless and you aren’t much better. You had a choice. You could have insisted that he break up with me first before fucking him and going away with him for weekend trips. You could not have spread your legs and when you did maybe use a condom, rather than risking my physical health. You could have not reached out to him repeatedly when he was in a relationship. Instead, you violated yourself and me by choosing instead to be a whore.
You cheat on a good woman and karma will make sure you end up with the bitch you deserve.
And he did. You got knocked up. So you both get the asshole you deserve. You get him, a violent, cheating, lying sleezeball. And he gets you a woman willing to devalue herself enough to take someone else’s man, stupid enough to believe everything he had to say, and even dumber to keep him after you knew the truth. You both deserve each other.
Please teach your children to count.
I hope your baby gets someone else’s brain. When your future son or daughter is old enough to date, I hope that you teach them this type of behavior is not acceptable. What would you do if your son did this? Or worse your daughter was in my position? How would you feel watching her cry herself to sleep at night? What would you tell her? Oh honey, it’s okay, you were the product of cheating. It’s really no big deal. Daddy and mommy are cheaters too.
Maybe you think I deserved it.
I will tell you the same thing I told him in an email a few months ago: No one deserves to be looked in their eyes and repeatedly lied to. No one deserves to be said I love you too and have it said to another woman (or multiples) at the same time. No one deserves their health jeopardized by their partner who repeatedly disregards birth control and STD protection. No one deserves to be left alone by their partner for days on end with no contact because they are off with another lover. No one deserves to be called crazy when they call someone out for lies and bullshit that in fact turn out to all be true. I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemies.
I don’t want a man that doesn’t want me.
Keep him. You can have him. I definitely don’t want a man that tells me he loves me then sleeps with other women. I also don’t want a man that that lies to his pregnant girlfriend while he tries to get back with his ex.
Yes, he text me, Snapchatted me (and other woman) while you were pregnant. But like a good person, I blocked him when I found out you were pregnant. Before that I did want him back, fucking idiot that I am too. And hell, you would have deserved me taking him back. He wanted me to. Text me and called me after I broke up with him. Telling me how sorry he was, how much he wanted to be with me, how he never thought it would end with us, how he still wanted me and wanted a future with me, how we were meant to be together, how he never thought that this would happen. Even after I blocked him he tried to contact me.
So sleep well tonight knowing he wanted me instead of being stuck with you. I wish you both the miserable life you deserve and all the heartache you caused to other people. Ashes to ashes, dust to side chicks.
#dusttosidechicks
XOXO
– J
Have you ever been cheated on? What would you say to the other woman?
